how it ends:

whateva they say goes right by me. the same as ever. the story of my life. deaf to sumone who possibly holds the key to the answers to my self absorbed questions. this continuous juggling of angst and despair. perpetually deaf to one whose arcane learning and keen wisdom might lead me from this pit, this unwanted, unasked-for pit of deep dark doubt, swarming hang-ups, split personality, snarling remorse and constant cowering from the world.

my life also is this hole. my life is: wake.drink.tv.shower.dress.shop.eat.tea.wallow.drink.tv.music.doodle.
pack.drugs.sleep.dream.wake.drink.chocolates.chill.swallow.chat.weigh.
drink.chocolates.phone.
hangout.fall.crawl.chocolates.rise.write.expire.wake.drink.shampoo...
how am I doing? definitely got this entire HOLE thing going.
my life was almost ruined. had the crappiest months of my life. its not easy to be me. life is not as simple as u want it to be.
entwining through a dark and difficult path. its so fucken hard to embrace each day without being a worry-wart. recent events trigger an insomnia attack. a viscious black cycle. hence, an increased amount of caffeine and chocolates intake. consumed endorphins can't take away all the pain in my head and heart.
my chocolate source: M&M'S peanuts, time-out,brownie,M&M's white chocs (NEW!),mudpie,choc chip & hazelnut cookies,
Kinder bueno, Hershey's cookies & cream...

-A gal,interrupted? A paint-pale-pastel princess? Or juz a mere drama-queen,craving for attention? Or an egoistic,brash,pale Bitch? Or a choosy,subtle flirt? Or sumone who makes simple things way too complex? Or juz a simple girl at heart?
I could be happy. If u teach me how.